As I am writing this post I am sitting in my mom’s living room looking out the window and just feeling tired and defeated. I have had the longest day and it’s not even over. I don’t understand how or why it’s possible for a baby to cry non stop. I haven’t been able to get dressed or eat because he doesn’t stop crying.
Nothing is wrong with him, he is fed, clean, loved at all times but he just doesn’t seem to want to stop crying. After an hour of nonstop crying I just felt defeated to the point where I screamed at my baby. I have never felt so terrible in my life, he doesn’t understand and probably his crying is because there is something wrong with him that I don’t understand or know nothing about. I can’t stop feeling sad and can’t stop crying I feel so bad.
My husband keeps telling me to not beat myself up, that he loves me and that we are both learning, it is a process, but I guess it must be the hormones or the fact that he is a man that I feel he doesn’t fully understand how I feel.
I know tomorrow is going to be better but damn, this is hard.
I usually post about the good things and how this process has been good to me, and all in all it has been good, but there are also bad days and today is for sure one of them.
If you are a mom and going through the same thing as I am, just know you are not alone.
Basically, todays post is just me venting, hope you enjoyed it anyways. As for any future moms reading this. Know that it is hard but there are for sure more good times than hard times.
UPDATE: I wrote this post back in April, and I thought it was never going to get better. Now Sergio is 7 months and let me tell you, we are enjoying every moment with him. He is so much fun, and the days where we had no clue what was happening are now over. Off course, I don’t know every thing but that fear you have as a new mom is slowly going away, little by little. Just know, it does get better and yes, when they are new born, sometimes they decide to cry with no apparent reason.